A lot of my comments seem to be reactions to your story, and way to involved with mine. Spent a lot of time in hospitals at a kid, and have known to many people that have died, of one thing or another, doesn’t matter what or how.
Suicide, however done, is rarely a rash move, teenagers aside. I don’t know what deadens one to the point that continuing on is not an option, or that the loss of what was one’s life, one’s world reaches a point, where life is not worth living. Just know, it it a choice, and loving them anyway, is also one.
Have had a lover overdoes, though after we had parted, a friend hang themselves, though we had moved on, a life long friend, and more, decide enough was enough, and it wrecked my world, but not my love for them. Those are just the one’s that am sure of, ignoring those who died in hospitals or hospice.
Your writing hits me, in places that had forgotten, and once again, takes my breath a way.