Acceptance may be the goal, but it is something that cannot be forced. Rather, perhaps like water over a rock, your presence, steadfastness, and in true Southern manners, politeness, will wear them down to see you for the person you are. Unnecessarily forcing things will just create another force to reckon with. Staying true, and being kind can work where other efforts fail
None of this is easy, have close relatives who do love me, but at times have a very hard time being around me. That is their privilege, and who am I does not deny them how they wish to be..